2010

Noong mga panahong maayos ayos pa ang kilay ko at wala pa akong buhok sa kili-kili, naging kaugalian ko na ang maglista ng mga bagay na gusto kong gawin sa buhay, kahit mga simple lang kagaya ng "7:46AM Mangulangot, 8:00 Tumae..., minsan nga kahit walang katuturan lang. Mga bagay na ayaw kong makalimutang gawin. Tinatawag ko itong ang aking TO-DO List-for-the-day.

There was once a time in my life when my eyebrows do not need threading as well as my armpits do not need to be shaved. These were the times when I had the right mind to enlist stuff that I need to do in my everyday routine. Stuff that I don’t want to forget like “7:46 AM Pick my nose, 8:00 Poo…, mostly stuff that does not make sense to other people, but for me these are the things I don’t want to miss out in my day. Oh yeah people, I used to be a very organized person… I used to have my TO-DO list-for-the-day, every single day. I was known for that.

Kapag naman sinisipag, meron din ako nung tinatawag ko dating "faith goals for the year." At dito ko na-aapreciate ang sarap ng feeling kapag may mga naiche-check ako sa aking mga checklist, meaning to say, 1 goal achieved na naman ako. Kaya naman naging ugali ko na ang bumili ng diary or planner tuwing October pa lang ng kasalukuyang taon. Kasi nga, it would take at least 2 months para isipin kung ano ang mga nais kong makamit for the following year. Kagaya ng someday-sisikat-din-ako-chorva at mga kaeklatang magma-migrate ako sa Canada echos!

When I feel like planning hard, I also have this nice list called “faith goals for the year.” With this, I love the feeling of putting a check on my achievements every year-end. It just means that I have again fulfilled something meaningful in my life. And so I make it a point to buy an organizer or a diary every October of the current year because it normally takes me 2 months to come up with some achievable goals in my list. Once, I actually have listed some bullshits like… “Work out on being famous…” and some boring aims like I will migrate to Canada (*insert rolling eyes here*)

Pero, eto nga ay noong hindi pa ako tinutubuan ng nunal sa singit, kaya ang utak ko ay nalalapit-lapit pa ng konti sa aking ulo, in short, kayang kaya ko pang magplano ng matitinong mga bagay gaya ng mag-toothbrush at maligo. Ibig sabihin, lately, nagkaroon ako ng kadramahan sa buhay na kung saan nasagasaan ako ng isang tricyle at nabagok ang utak ko sa naka-usling bakal nang hindi pa natatapos na kanal sa kanto ng sheikh zayed road. At dahil sa sitwasyong ito, nalaglag ang ballpen ko, dina tuloy ako makapag-sulat.

But, this was me when I still don’t have a mole on my groin and that my brain was still quite close to my head. In short, I still have the right mind to head on to the right path and do sensible, human-like activities such as brush my teeth and take a bath. Well, that’s because lately… I have been through a traumatic experience where I was hit by a tricycle and my head had been knocked over a protruding rod in an under-construction pavement along sheikh zayed road. And while these things were happening, I sadly dropped my ballpen, lost it… and so I can no longer write. (yeah, go figure)

Na-miss ko na ang magsulat ng mga plano ko sa buhay. Na-miss ko na ang sarap ng feeling ng nagche-check ng mga achievements ko. At nang mga failures na ike-carry over ko lang naman for the following year. Nakaka-miss ang maging busy sa career, ang maging workaholic. At lalong nakaka-miss ang feeling ng self-worth and confidence.

I miss writing my goals in life. I suddenly pined for the sweetness of grabbing my list and putting a check on my achievements. I do of course have failures, but I don’t take them as such. I take them as just a delay which I just carry over for the next year. I miss being busy in my career, I miss being a workaholic. But mostly, I yearn for the feeling of self worth and confidence.

Kaya lang, habang petiks pa ang buhay ko ngayon, naisipan ko pa ring bumili ng aking 2010 diary. At dahil dito, nais kong i-share sa inyo ang aking mga bagay na gustong i-achieve for next year. Ito yung mga goals na na-postpone. Mga plano na under-process pa lang before ako magka-amnesia. At ang iba naman ay mga bagay na hindi maalis-alis sa utak ko. Mga bagay na matagal ko nang pinangarap, pero diko lang sineryoso, pero ngayon seseryosohin ko na. Kaya kung may maitutulong ka, you are welcome to give me the opportunity to achieve all of these goals below:

But since I am still in my lazy mood, I still thought of buying my diary. And I want to share with you the stuff that I want to achieve for next year. These were the objectives that have been postponed. Some were under process before I had the amnesia. And mostly were thoughts that I can’t take out from my mind. Things that I’ve always wanted to do, but some of them were really crazy, so I never took them seriously, but now I intend to… So if you think you can help, you are welcome to give me that opportunity:

1. Kumanta sa harapan ng audience nang may microphone. Opo. Matagal ko nang frustration ang kumanta with feelings. Yun bang papalakpakan ako ng audience. (If you will notice ang audience po is pronounced with an "S" sa dulo, gramatically speaking, plural yan... ibig sabihin maraming tao ang manonood.) Yung fi-feeling-in ko talaga ang pagkanta mala- Alanis Morissette or Sheryl Crow, gigita-gitara or something... Hindi maganda ang boses ko, inaamin ko yun at di rin ako magaling mag-gitara pero isa lang ang asset ko, makapal ang mukha ko... (Takte kayo, wag kayong magdadala ng kamatis ha!) Pero seriously, isa yan sa mga pangarap ko at gagawin ko yan balang araw... Habang may buhay, may kalamay...
1. Sing in front of an audience with a microphone. It has always been my frustration to perform with feelings. That kind of performance where the audience will clap with gusto! (If you will notice… “audience” is pronounced with an “s” in the end… so grammatically speaking that is plural, meaning there should be more than 1 person in there, clapping for me). I wanted to feel the song like how Alanis Morissette or Sheryl Crow sings them, and will play the guitar if it’s not too much to ask. I must admit though that I’m not good at playing the guitar and I can’t f* make a tune but the good thing is I have a very stable self confidence, a forgetful mind and I have no shame at all. A very good combination for a future famous singer I can say… I only have one request for my followers… no tomatoes please!

2. Mag-drive ng Range Rover or Escalade. Wala akong balak bumili nito. Pero manghang mangha ako sa sasakyang ito. Pag nakakakita ako ng ganito sa daan, sobra akong naa-amaze. Ang i-drive lang ito ay ayos na sa akin. Gusto ko kasing maramdaman kahit papano ang mag-drive ng isang luxury car. At minsan, ini-imagine ko din kasi kung paano mag-drive ang isang pandakekong katulad ko ng isang higanteng sasakyan. Makikita pa kaya ako na nagda-drive?

2. To drive a Range Rover or Escalade. I don’t have plans on buying one. It’s not like I couldn’t afford it, I am rich ya know (hahaha), but I have always been amazed with these huge cars. Driving this maybe just once is good enough for me… I just want to know the feeling of driving a luxury car. And sometimes I also imagine how a midget like me is going to drive a humongous car like this. Wondering if you’ll ever see me in the driver’s seat.

3. Mag publish ng sarili kong libro. Ang title ay... "The Life and Times of Andeng Buraot." Bumili kayo mga ka-epal ko hah!
3. To publish my own book. The title would be… “The Life and Times of Andeng Buraot [Andeng Annoying].” To all my avid e-pals… I force you to buy.

4. Mai-angkas sa isang motorbike ng isang hunk na hunk na gwapong gwapong Papa-Material. Woooooohhhh, trip ko yung mabilis na mabilis ang pagpapatakbo niya tapos sisigaw ako sa takot... habang naka-kapit ako ng mahigpit sa kanyang dibdib, (bawal daw ang himas, wala sa kontrata... hahaha, binayaran pala!)

4. To have a motorbike ride with a super-hunk and mega-handsome Papa-Material [Boyfriend Material]. Woooohhooohhhhh!!! I would love the feeling of him running the bike so fast and then I will shout at the top of my voice because I am so scared to my guts, while clutching so hard in his chest. (Disclaimer: caressing, cuddling and touching is not part of the contract… hahahha this is paid service, mind you)

5. To get a tattoo... Wag na kayong magtanong kung saan ko ipapalagay. Basta gusto ko magpa-tattoo... ng dinosaur sa aking balikat.
5. To get a tattoo. Don’t ask me where I want to have it. I just want to have a tattoo… of a dinosaur on my shoulder.

6. Basahin ang isa sa aking obra-maestrang tula sa isang poetry reading.
6. To read one of my masterpiece poem in a poetry reading event.

7. To be painted... NUDE. Hahaha, joke lang, pero pangarap ko talagang may mag-pinta sa akin, kahit na kilay ko lang.
7. To be painted… NUDE. Hahaha, I’m just kidding. But one of my ambitions really is for someone to draw a painting of me. Even if it’s just my eyebrows.

8. Ang magpa make-over kay Dr Calayan. Papatanggal ko yung mga pimples ko at mga peklat ko sa katawan. Papagawa ko ang aking boobs… ilong, puwit, tenga at ngala-ngala, hahahha!
8. To have a make-over with Dr. Calayan5. I want to get rid of my annoying pimples and disgusting scars, have a bit of a boob job, nose job, butt job, blow job… hahahaha!

9. Ang mapasama sa MTV ng Burger House Boys.
9. To be casted with Burger House Boys MTV

10. WSOB. (*YM niyo na lang ako kung curious kayo sa ibig sabihin nito*)
10. WSOB. (*Give me a buzz on my Yahoo Messenger if you are curious on what this means*)